


Reflection

by orphan_account



Series: Merlin One-Shots/Character Studies [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Canon Era, Character Study, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 16:47:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8540779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Arthur and his Pensive-Staring-Out-The-Chamber-Window(TM).





	

It wasn’t just that Merlin was so different than the others Arthur was often surrounded by, having grown up in a palace with an imposing king as a father, burly guards and loads and loads of sturdy knights everywhere. Arthur could pick his teeth with Merlin’s bones.

And Merlin was a dollophead, to be certain; useless in the kitchen, with laundry, making the bed, bringing Arthur his meals on time. Horrendously ill-coordinated. Terrible liar. Borderline moronic when it came to anything strategic or helpful. 

But- Arthur had to admit. There were things about Merlin he couldn’t understand that he begrudgingly…respected. 

Mostly--and possibly most frustratingly--how Merlin seemed to see things: how he seemed to see the world, with an unclouded clarity. There was a moral heart beating strong and steadfast at the core of his wiry self. A moral strength that Arthur often found himself envying.

Arthur wasn’t that way at all. 

His world was smaller than he cared to admit. Far more black and white; the kingdom and the people in it. His land, his people, his position; that was Arthur’s world. 

Merlin’s world seemed vast, in comparison. Running errands in the surrounding forests for Gaius in the mornings, dining with other servants--other peoples, freely making his way to and from the tavern and the market and- anywhere he pleased. He had friends; Gaius, Gwen, Gwaine, Lancelot--seemed as if every other newcomer to Camelot received a warm welcome into Merlin’s world.

…It irked Arthur. Made him squirm, pensively perched at the window in his chambers as he looked out over the courtyard to see Merlin and Gawain having a chat, or Merlin and Gwen taking a stroll, or Lancelot assisting Merlin with Arthur’s chores.

There was something about his manservant.

More than envy though, the problem was--frightening as it may be--that there was no one’s friendship he desired more than Merlin’s. 

It had taken Arthur several years to understand, but there it was; there was no one’s respect he desired more, and no one’s opinion he valued above, Merlin’s. 

The simple truth of it all was that Arthur’s relationship with Merlin meant more to him than he cared to articulate, even to himself.

Arthur could be a prat. He could bully Merlin, tease him, challenge him, and his manservant would not only take it, but throw it back with a fond roll of his eyes. With Merlin, Arthur could be confused, angry, frustrated, sad. Vulnerable. 

And Merlin accepted it all. 

It was alarming to realize that he wouldn’t be that man he is without his stupid, faithful friend.

\---


End file.
